Two years ago today, what started out as a seemingly normal day ended as everything but… Two years ago today, he went HOME. I still hear the thump of his fall, the sound of his moan, the sound of him gasping for air, my screams at the 911 operator quite vividly. “HURRY! 🤬🤬🤬” I still question why he didn’t tell me anything. I still question if they really did “everything they could”. I still question everything, though knowing there was absolutely nothing I (or anyone) could have done differently to change the circumstances. I still wish this wasn’t reality.
I am my boss’s Secret Santa, talk about pressure! I got him candy, some silly socks as requested and I handcrafted decor for his office. But as I was reading his profile, this tie came to mind! And so I gifted him my husband’s tie. This is what I wrote on the note: I believe gifts have to have a story. That they have to be practical, that they are better when they are handmade, and that second hand is always best. Like this tie. Though not handmade, it is practical, it is second-hand, and it has a story. Boy does it have a story. This tie was owned by the greatest man I’ve ever known. Had you complimented his tie while he was wearing it, he would have taken it off and given it to you without question. Even as a total stranger, but in return, he would have asked for you to listen to one of his infamous dad-jokes which would have likely been made up on the spot. He was the type of guy who would never leave a room without making at least one friend. He was a NAVY vet who was funny, kind, wise, easy-going, and always stood up for what was right even if it went against the status quo. He would have loved knowing that this tie is going to be worn by an elementary school principal, his best audience after all happened to be 5-12yr olds. They always laughed at his jokes! Don’t be surprised if magically you start thinking up of random knock-knock jokes, puns, etc. It’s likely some of the Wesley Magic woven inside of it. Merry Christmas, I hope you like the story of this tie.
In a complicated relationship with… Grief. About two months ago I decided it was time. Time to wear my wedding rings differently. Wearing them on my left hand just felt fake. Like I was in denial. But not wearing them at all wasn’t an option. So I’ve been wearing them on my right hand. On the days when the grief is heavy, I wear them on my left (so please be kind to me if you see me wearing them on my left). This grief thing is so complicated. It’s a continuous internal struggle with self-doubt and questioning the things that may seem so simple to others. Friends, it isn’t that simple. The struggle is real! Real hard, real confusing, real crazy, real sad, real comforting, real beautiful, real weird, real UGH!